Laugh it out……..35

September 22, 2009

A hypothetical situation where 20 CEOs board an airplane and are told
That the flight that they are about to take is the first-ever to feature
Pilotless technology:

“It is an uncrewed aircraft.”

Each one of the CEOs is then told, privately, that their company’s software
is running the aircraft’s automatic pilot system.

Nineteen of the CEOs promptly leave the aircraft, each offering a different
type of excuse.

One CEO alone remains on board the jet, seeming very calm indeed.

Asked why he is so confident in this first uncrewed flight, he
replies: “If it is the same software that’s developed by my company’s IT systems
department, this plane won’t even take off!!!! .”

That is called Confidence!!!

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Laugh it out…………..34

September 8, 2008

Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.
The teacher says, “Why are you arguing?”

One boy answers, “We found a ten dollor and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.”

“You should be ashamed of yourselves,” said the teacher, “When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was.”

The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.


Laugh it out……… 33

August 20, 2008

 

VINAYA HEGDE forwards a good forward:

“Last night my wife and I were sitting in the living room, talking about life. In between, we talked about the idea of living or dying.

“I said to her: ‘Never let me live in a vegetative state, totally dependent on machines and liquids from a bottle. If you see me in that state I want you to disconnect all the contraptions that are keeping me alive, I’d much rather die.’

“Then my wife got up from the sofa with a real look of admiration towards me and proceeded to disconnect the TV, the cable, the dish, the DVD, the computer, the cell phone, the iPod, and the X-box, and then went to the fridge and threw away all my beer.

“I almost died.”


Laugh it out……………32

August 11, 2008

Several weeks after a yopung man had been hired, he was called into the MD’s cabin.
“what is this ?” the md asked . you said you had 5 yrs of exp.now we discover this is your first job .”Well , the young man replied “in your ad you said you wanted some one with good imagination”.


Laugh it out …………31

August 5, 2008

2 brothers were having their breakfast one morning.. it’s cereals with hot chocolate.. the younger brother finished his drink and took his bowl of cereal, and went to the aquarium. Just as he was about to feed the fish with the bowl of cereals, his mother came in and shouted, ‘jon, dont do it!! the fish will die!!’ the little boy turned pale, and gave his mother a desperate look..


Laught it out…. 30

July 24, 2008

Once a man went to a Veterinary Doctor in India and said:

Doctor I have come on vacation for a month so that I can get myself treated

fully within this period.

Doctor: I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic,

see that board.

Man: No, Doctor, I have come to you only

Doctor: But, gentleman I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal

specialist. I do not treat human beings.

Man: I know, Doctor very well and that is why I have come to you only…

Doctor: I can not, because you speak like me, think like me, talk

like me which means you are a human being and not an animal.

Man: I know I am a human but litsen to my complaints first:

Doctor: OK. Tell me.

Man:

I sleep vigilantly like a dog thinking about my work load whole night.

I get up in the morning like a horse

I go to work running like a deer

I work all the day like a donkey

I run around for 11 months like a bull without any holiday.

I wag my tail in front of all my bosses

I play with my children like a monkey if I get time.

I am like a rabbit before my wife

Doctor: are you a Software Engineer?

Man: Yes

Doctor: Instead of telling this long history you should have told me

in the begining itself that you are are an engineer.

Come on man, no one can treat you better than me.


Mahabharat 2050…. Jai ektha kapoor!!

July 8, 2008

The much awaited magnum opus from ektha’s stable was showcased yesterday on one of the channels. Having a good knowledge of not only the original epic but also ekthas way of spreading the same was something i could not guess very much.

Before we begin dissecting the show, my due apologies to Maharishi vedavysa et all for the cruel descriptions.

If one follows kannada movies, we have a hero jaggesh – the navarasa nayaka. This means the actor can give splendid performences (?) in the 9 different emotions / aspects a person can possibly depict in a role/ roles as applicable.

The reason why we talk of jageesh here is because, the epic orginally has all the different emotions in different hues,shades,colours, vibrations etc which can be enjoyed, understood. Ektha is popular for her flashback – so much, the original script is forgotton, hystrinics, revenge – woman to woman variety.

The first episode was entirely depicted in a very cruel sattaire – barring a crying vedhavyasa at the end whom Lord bramha consoles. The episode mainly consisted of the pandavas loosing everything, Draupadhi being dragged to central stage, attempt to de-robe her and Lord krishna saving her.

Draupadhi was quite modern with her dress and if you didnt throw a soft porn gyration song in lines of bollywood with dhuryodhan – it was missing with all her mannerisums. Bheem was nicely picturised showing his agony and anger – the camera work was just great with a low closeup. The same was used on all other brothers which was not required.

All the warriors looked as if they decended from some modern sci-fi including Arjun who was wielding an iron bow!! Took me back to the basics taught about archery in discovery channel recently.

Why ektha decided to clad all the pandavas in black was haunting me through out but when Draupadhi called out for ‘sakha’ ( intelligent folks have to understand this as krishna), horror of horror, a nirma soap advertisement wheel came from some where and generated the required red colour saree – man was that china silk?

Draupadhi then breaks into ekthas trade mark hystronics and chastises every man on earth!!!

There are some plus points too. The sound track done on DTS is superb and a treat to ears. If you have the same, its enjoyable on home theatre systems. If sagar had to shoot some fireworks in closeup and show it for every fight, ektha has the modern software to do much more and irritate the viewers. The camara work is excellent who shows the anger of bheemasena using the sharp edges of his mace!

Characterisation plays a very important role in epics of this nature and ektha forgot this i suppose – maybe purposefully. None of the characters are recognizable unless they are addressed. They all are dressed, look and talk similarly!!

Was trying to help my junior understand the epic better using visual medium but knowing the future with ekthas methodology – its better junior doesnt learn such things!!