Laugh it out … 20

September 26, 2007

The pair of glamorus actor mother and upcoming daughter pair were allways on the party circuit. One day in one of such parties, one of them asked the mother ‘how old would you be’.

Taken little aback at the direct question, mother with a trusted smile hiding the wrinkles replied ‘Not a day older than 26 my dear’.

The same question re-appeared in different party circuites and to the alarm of the daugther, based on the number of pegs working inside mother, the number dwindled to a near 15 plus.

It was one of such rave parties when the same question popped up – now a days more for the fun than the fact and before mother could tell the routine smile and splurt stuff, daughter hastily pulled mother aside and wispered “Tell them any number you want, I dont really care but make sure you keep atleast 9 months between our ages please”.

Travel Trails…Gadag Hails 2

September 20, 2007

We took that time in a mix of confusion and looked around. We were surrounded by a semi-urban scenary. There was this hugh double – main road but sans the people, traffic and choas that urban centres are infamous far. There was limited greenary around and we were exchanging glances with locals who were looking rustic with red lips and minding their own businesses.

It dawned to us as vijay who also hailed from north karnataka educated us that in mysore side ( south karanataka is referred as mysore in general like all south indians are madrasis for north indians!) we provide coffee to any visiting guest and in this place, they would offer bettle nut and yele and that was why everybody seemed to be crunching on the ‘yale’ with red mouths. I concluded that red lips are far better than red faces.

It looked like that rudrappa and his scooter was gone for years that we sighted the dust swirl on a side road and the chetak screeched to a halt with a perspiring rudrappa. Inbetween breaths he explained as if he had run the marathon and not mounted the scooter – ” Bus sikktu adre alle yaru illa marayre…. conductor sikllilla adre kalu thasu iddru yaru kellake barlillre..” ( He reached the bus but nobody was their to claim the package. He waited for 15 minutes but nobody came).

Rudrappa said , lets first reach home and get fresh as the muhurath is for 10.35AM and we woudnt want to miss the marriage. Nodding our head, we moved belongings and ourselves and went through the maze called gadag.

We got into one of maheshs brand new house and did our daily essentials and were treated to ‘karada puri and ounde’ for breakfast. Tough but we managed it assuming a sumptous lunch would help us forget this breakfast.

The wedding went through fine and we had all forgotten the marriage till in the afternoon when we got back to his uncle’s house for a couple of hours cat nap. It was prabhakars curiosity which killed the cat!. After concensus, we opened the package. Bombs were unknown in those days -nor was anthrax known so it was safe to open the package and out emerged to white, VIP banians!! And, there was one more packet wrapped in ordinary brown package.

Quickly we opened the inner package and were immideatly treated to the fresh aroma of dharawad mishra pedas – about 1 odd kilos!!!

This was a royal treat of sweets to all 6 of us including his uncles. Rudrappa decided to donate the banians to his house hold help while we thanked the unknown gifter and with some guilty heart munched away at the fresh pedas!

By 2pm we took a small car and went visiting the famous badami where we would not forget one mistake for ever. We left all our shoes/chappals in the car and attempted to walk the heated stones at 3pm which resulted in smiles from locals while we learnt a quick course bharathanatyam. An old woman whos face had more wrinkles than features offered us majjige ( butter milk) and refused to accept money saying that was her ‘kayaka’ to treat gods messengers!!

Badami was followed quickly by a visit in the evening to kudagala sangama and we sat in silence in front of bashveshwaras samadhi while listining to the swirling sound of water above his samadhi ( one has to walk downstairs inside the sangama for this). It was a devine feeling with which we came back tired to gadag the same night.

The return journey was un eventfull as the same story repeated and we fell asleep on each others shoulder, bag or what ever and reached bangalore.

Mahesh is happily married with a kid and we recount his marriage experiences even today when we meet up ocassionally.

Travel Trails…Gadag Hails

September 13, 2007

Our good friend mahesh had fallen in love with his ‘mavana magalu’ and decided to get married. The bride was hailing from Gadag and since most of their relatives hailed from around those areas, it was decided that he gets married there.

After all the initial leg pulling, teasing and invitations, 5 of us friends decided to take off and participate in the proceedings much to the happiness of my friend. Like all friends circle, here too we had lots of if’s, but’s and not much confirmation and hence we said, all people planning to hit this marriage trail will have to assemble 2 hours before 8.30 pm super delux bus to Gadag departs at KSRTC bus stand.

By 7.30 Prashanth and Prabhakar my neighbours with me in toeline, reached the bus stand by 7.30 and found that there was no booking counter and tickets would be issued in the bus itself. So, it meant wrestling and getting into the bus for a seat – traditional first sight , first fight basis!

It was amazing how people behave in public places – some are upto interesting antics and we kept a sharp lookout for that bus of ours. At 7.05, a dusty bus pulled in and the conductor nodded when we asked if it was the 8.30PM semi delux. Silently we three were joined by our other friend vijay and the foursome rushed to get a seat.

People were thursting napkins, hankies, small luggage from outside the bus for booking. One gentlemen wrapped his pair of slippers in a piece of news paper and dropped it right into one of the window seats!!

Luckily prabhakar and vijay got front seats while we two got seats at backside of the bus.

The bus departed at 8.50PM, pregenent with people, hopes and aspirations.

Me and prashanth were discussing about how he should go about giving up his sales job in torrent pharma and start off on his own. Being brought up in the traditional era lacking enthruprunal motivations, we were cautioning him of more negative effects than any positivies at all. They say advice is cheap it does not harm the giver in any ways.

We just dont know when we both dozed off, dancing to the lalluby of the pot holes etc. We stopped around 2pm for a tea somewhere and prashanth loaded himself with one ‘goli solda’ while i continued to be in half coma.

The early sun rays were kissing the window panes when we realized the bus had stopped. Conductor smiled and said ‘gadag innu bandillaree… 20 minute prayana ade…konthukolli’.

Suddenly the bus pulled into a rural bus stop and men and woman just boarded the bus. Later found that it was the weekly shanty and people were trying to catch the early bus for better bargains!

It was quite amusing to find that woman folk at front did not have money to buy tickets and told ‘nammovru – hinde idare ree’ – my spouse is behind and will buy my fare. The tradition is that the woman will not spell her husbends name and it was funny to see the conductor shout from front – ‘yaru iddera – ee yamman rokka kodoke?’. By the time all this matching completed, the bus halted near the main road of Gadag and we saw mahesh’s cousine waiting for us on a chetak scooter.

We all got down and the luggage that was hurridly thrust into overhad compartments were removed from prabhakar and deposited at the kerb of the road. Prabhakar shouted – idu ninda kit bagu? And I nodded saying ‘get down all the 3 bags’.

Rudrappa was running a paint busines off his own and had come to direct us to the house in gadag. The early morning heat was just picking up and sending a steady stream of sweat down my sidelocks.

We all picked up our bags and one brown packet remained.

It took us full 2 minutes to realize the mistake. Prabhakar had taken off somebodies packet. Rudrappa immideatly took the packet and asked us to stay put and went full throttle of 35 kmph the roads allowed the chetak to zoom and went behind the bus to give it back to the rightfull owner.

to be continued….

Laugh it out … 19

September 12, 2007

In the golden days of cyclying liesurly to work, it was an offence to ride the cycle without headlamps after dusk and policemen used to take people to task.

Ramu had gone to drop the tiffen carrier to vani vilas hospital for his neighbour, who was expecting a kid anytime on his hired cycle for 25ps and it got late and was furiously found pedelling near Lalbagh west gate when a constable stopped him.

CONstable: Yeno… light yello badava?

Ramu :(Struggling for breath) Sir… ishtondu belaku innu irovaga light yake sahebre? [When there is so much light still around; why do we need a lamp?]

CONstable: Houdenu?

He proceeds to deflate the cycle tyres despite ramu’s resistance.

CONstable: Ishtondu gali horgade irovaga; tubenalli yako badava? [When there is so much air around us, why do you need it still in your tubes?]

Laugh it out … 18

September 5, 2007

The 4th standard boys were given an assignment. This was to write a single paragraph about thier pet dog and submit by end of week.

The teacher was browsing and grading the reports on saturday when she noticed a couple of identical reports. She called both the boys and asked “why are both your reports identical? Who copied from whom/”

Surpressing a smile one of the boy said “we did not copy mam”.

Teacher raising the voice asked “Then how come they are identical?”

The second boy now opened his mouth “We wrote the essay looking at the same dog”