Jamming

In high school we were introduced to this cocophony called jamming where all the NCC cadets joined hands, legs, mouth except ears on saturday afternoons to practice thier music and was called jamming!!

Now I have noticed like others a new kind of jamming – yes the king of all jams – traffic jams. Here is a set of pointers of how to create those jams – they are usefull to oil companies, automobile industry, contractors, politicians even those uneducated migrant laborours who depend on us citizens to jam so that we can cut more tress, build more roads, bridges and savour all that money.

Pedestrians are the first source for this – you can walk on the road joyfully irrespective of a footpath, cross inbetween maddening traffic despite overhead bridges and ensure every thing screeches to a halt. There are some heroic folks who did not get the vehicles stopped at correct moment and migrated to different worlds.

The cross country cyclist – an endangered species can be usefull too. You need to master the art of criss cross cycling and throw all traffic behind you to choas.

The autowallahs are kings in this domain. They have discovered and inititated new school of thought. Just sight an auto going slowly in the road looking out for a passenger – he is the king of the road ( sorry lorrey wallah!). When he sights a passenger, he hits the kerb from which ever lane he is in, ensuring many a minor jam. After the passenger gets in, he does a U turn – mind me even in one-ways to ensure the jam takes place.

The bigger brothers on bikes who do hip dancing ensure jams take place by nudging thier arsenel front wheels at unsuspecting cars and bus and ensure they have the right of way. Some times they travel to other worlds too – courtesy a lorry or bus which has similar intentions. They indirectly contribute to jams when they do figure 8 between cars in slow moving traffic. The bumper of a car hitting any other vehicle ensures arguments and jams.

The highest order drivers – busses and lorries follow their own methods. They can stop the vehicle in centre of roads, particularly at bus stops at the beginning of intersections and many kilometers get jammed. The prize for this goes to route 210 which jammed the entire BTM layout once with a miscalculated left turn out of the bus terminus and 5 buses behind bumper to bumpter.

Hopefully readers can contribute with novel ideas and enrich the country.

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7 Responses to Jamming

  1. Prasanna Sastry says:

    Nammu ooru nalli entha paristhithi ella, yaake andre gaaDi bandu Dikki hoDada re avanu directly …ghat.

  2. neela says:

    nammoralli handi,migrant labourersu, private bussugaLu ishte saaku jaamgagi.bikers ella illi tumba forwardu..avaru mostly aakaashadalli teltaa irtaare feni/other elements sevisi…

  3. Sastry,
    Concluded!!

    Neela,
    So you are experiencing the initial phases of jamming essential. just wait and in a couple of years you can experience the full fun of it.

  4. spare the poor bigger brothers on bikes.

  5. srik,
    I would say spare everybody pls 🙂

  6. kalyan says:

    It is interesting how everyone of us in the race to be ahead of the other is actually creating a situation, where no-one can move.

  7. Kalyan,
    Wow, What a nice way of putting things. You are so right. This is the phenomenon one can watch not only on the roads but in every other aspect of life. NO wonder, none of us can move little more than a few centimeters in terms of growth in life.

    This leads me to believe in the old philonthropic ways of elders which ensure the neighbour got the goody first – a method by which this race is eliminated and happiness shared with everybody.

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